Time: 1988
Place: Mack's house
Characters: My friend Mack and I

Mack: Did I show you my new GI Joe figure?
Alex: [looking at it] Oh, cool, who is he?
Mack: It's Tanker, man!
Alex: Tanker? This isn't Tanker, that's Tanker [pointing to other GI Joe figure on his display shelf]
Mack: No, this is Ultra-Cool-Night-Stalker-Tanker. That's just plain old Tanker.
Alex: So how are we going to play war with two Tankers?
Mack: I have three. Don't forget Desert Tanker!
Alex: Why are there three Tankers?
Mack: Cause this is cool Ultra-Cool-Night-Stalker Tanker, that's Desert Tanker, and that's regular Tanker.
Alex: Whhyyyyyyyyy?
Mack: I dunno. The same reasons there are five Cobra Commanders. They look cool.
Alex: But... but... then why did they make the original Tanker look so bland?
Mack: Cause, that's regular Tanker, this is Ultra-Cool...
[Alex explodes]


Time: 2002
Place: My parents' house
Characters: Dad and I

Alex: Who's playing?
Dad: Marlins and the Braves.
Alex: Oh, the Marlins changed their uniforms again. What's up with the Braves gettup?
Dad: I don't know, I think it's retro day or something.
Alex: Again? The Marlins are too new to even have a retro look...
Dad: I don't know. The Rangers were playing with "Washington" on their jerseys earlier.
Alex: I wonder how many uniforms they wear in a year.
Dad: Well, there's the home and away jerseys. Also don't forget the Sunday jerseys. They wear green for St. Patrick's Day. They have their spring training jerseys. I think they also have an Ultra-Cool-Night-Stalker jersey, too...
[Alex explodes this time because he DOES understand]