Cleaning the Treehouse
R. Alex Whitlock
T
Note the pig-sty behind me...
here's a name for the special kind of woman to volunteer to spend a whopping 10 hours hepling to clean up a man's pig-sty after just having met him less than a week before.

That name is clean-freak.

Lisa: Are we still going to hang out today?
RAW: It looks like probably not. I need to clean up my apartment.
Lisa: How long will that take.
RAW: Got any plans next month?

RAW: Woah! This stuff is awesome! What is it?
Lisa: Tilex, Babe. Your Tilex, in fact.
RAW: We should be in a commercial.

RAW: I'm tired. Break?

Lisa: Good god, Alex, how much Tilex are you using? How can you even breathe in there?
RAW: I have no sense of smell, remember?
Lisa: Want mine?

RAW: I'm tired. Break?

Lisa: You're wiping the mirror wrong.
RAW: There's a wrong way to wipe a mirror?
Lisa: If you don't want streaks.
RAW: They're better than spots. I'm not aiming for perfection here.
Lisa: No, no. Wipe it in really small circles.
RAW: [looks at large mirror] That's a lot of small circles.
Lisa: I know, but you gotta do it. It's like waxing a car.
RAW: [blink]
Lisa: You know... [does small circle motion with hands]
RAW: [blink blink]
Lisa: [throws hands into the air]

RAW: I'm tired. Break?

Lisa: What are you doing?
RAW: Typing something...
Lisa: [looks] Alex... you're a Republican?
RAW: Wow! We sure have been on break a while. Back to work for us!

Lisa: Got any paper towels?
RAW: Of course...
Lisa: Go get them?
RAW: Sure [thumps down stairs]... [thumps up stairs] No paper towels. Will toilet paper work?
Lisa: ...
RAW: Okay, what else WILL work?
Lisa: Dry cloth.
RAW: Don't have any...
Lisa: You don't have ANY towels? What do you use to dry off??
RAW: Oh! Towels? Sure, I have those.
Lisa: Cloth... dry... [shakes head, wonders what language he might be fluent in]

RAW: I'm tired. Break?

Lisa: I need a duster.
RAW: DOn't have one. Don't worry about it.
Lisa: No, I NEED a duster...
RAW: There isn't THAT much dust.
Lisa: Doesn't matter... dust... dust is bad... so very, very bad.
RAW: [blink]

RAW: I'm tired. Break?

Note the relative absense of pig styity!
Lisa: Where's the vacuum cleaner?
RAW: Don't worry about vacuuming. As long as we get all the coins off the floor we'll be fine...
Lisa: Where's the vacuum cleaner?
RAW: The floor isn't that dirty. Besides, what stains there are will require Oxy-Clean..
Lisa: Where's the vacuum cleaner?
RAW: There's also cables everywhere. It'll take forever and a day just to get them out of the way...
Lisa: Where's the vacuum cleaner?
RAW: Downstairs by the kitchen door. It's an old Kirby.
Lisa: Oooooooh... Kirby!

RAW: I'm tired. Break?

Lisa: You okay?
RAW: I'm fine.
Lisa: You just have this look on your face.
RAW: I feel like I'm in a hotel room.
Lisa: Why?
RAW: It's clean. Not used to this. It's kind of neat.
Lisa: Uhmm... Alex. It's not as clean as most hotels.
RAW: Why not?
Lisa: They dust.
Posted to Living Quarters
 
 

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