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"I Guess The Winter Makes You Laugh A Little Slower"
R. Alex Whitlock
So apparently when the temperature gets down to zero, and then it gets colder, the temperature reflects this by having the numerical values go up again except with a "-" in front of it. This morning it was apparently minus-sign-nine degrees in Pocatello and minus-sign-twelve in Idaho Falls.
You know how sometimes it's not as hot or cold as the temperature suggests? Yeah, this was not so much one of those times. It felt like my hand was going to freeze off just during the five minutes it took to scrape my windshield of that pesky cold, translucent film that seems to appear when it gets cold and precipitates.
Even the smokers around the office are going to forego their habit today. One said that he didn't even smoke on his drive to work because that would have required opening the window up a crack.
Apparently I don't have to worry about snow because they tell me that when it gets this cold it doesn't really snow. I guess that's a good thing. Also a good thing is that I will get to step all over the ice again when it starts getting a little warmer. I like the cracking sound it makes (when my
foot is hitting the ice, not my butt when I slip and fall).
Even now at the height of coldidity, if you stand outside for a few minutes, you will almost certainly hear the sound of ice cracking
somewhere. If you stand outside for a few minutes, you're nuts.
Some guy was washing his car at the gas station where I filled up this morning. First, I was surprised that the water even worked. There was a column of ice on the wall where the water coming out of the leaky hose had frozen. Second, I'm not sure whether he was actually wanting to clean is car from dirt or get the ice off. I can't help but believe that either would be a mistake.
My car's CD player doesn't like the cold weather. So for the first ten minutes of my drive I have to listen to the radio. Do you know how inconvenient a time of year it is for this to become part of my routine? I would have to endure 2.5 Christmas songs or so, were it not for the fact that I just find a station playing commercials and leave it there.
Human beings were not meant to live this way.
Observations
Ooooooh,
Rust and smoke, the heater's broke,
the door just blew away,
I light a match to see the dash
and then I start to pray
Oh!
Frame is bent, the muffler went,
the radio it's OK,
oh what fun it is to drive my
Rusty Chevrolet!
I don't know if you caught it, but it was 42 below in West Yellowstone today.
My lovely discovery today was that Becky's car doesn't start when it's this cold for this long. Maybe it's time to invest in a block heater...
We hit -31F the night before last and I think it was colder last night. Yesterday's high was -5F. That's right...high.
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