Netscape.com has a He Said / She Said feature in which I guess they regularly tackle intergenderal dating issues. The one tonight is about asking your partner how many partners they've had.

Both sides agree that it's not a good idea to get too specific about it. I've never asked and have only been asked once after the relationship had ended.

Dad told me once that there was a Native American tribe that only counted none, one, two, and many. I think that's about the right way of going about it.

"How many partners have you had, Jerry?"

"In the words of my Indian ancestors, many, but before you slap me that only means more than two."

"That's not an answer..."

"Sure it is. I will do my ancestors honor by using their numbering system for the question and only their numbering system."

[SLAP]

Or maybe not.

The whole subject also reminds me of Kevin Smith's Clerks when the main character goes berzerk when he discovers how many men his girlfriend has performed felatio on. Makes me curious how a guy would respond if informed their girlfriend specified some exact number over fifty.

"Are you upset?" she asks.

"No... no, I just need you to do something for me."

"What's that?"

"Hold on," he says as he scans his bookshelf. "Here you go."

"Why are you giving me a copy of the Lord of the Rings trilogy?"

"I really, really, REALLY need you to read this three times this year for me."

Bababeesh.